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Quaddie win results in its share of heartbreak

A FRIEND of this column recently told a story of a day at the races that was supposed to be a joyful occasion but, unfortunately, ended on a sour note.

After neglecting jobs such as mowing the lawns and clearing the spouting, his stocks on the homefront were plummeting quickly.

As a way of arresting this, he decided to take his wife to the races and give her five-star treatment.

Seated in a private dining room with champagne laid on, the husband felt that this attempt at setting things right was working well.

Midway through the afternoon he said it was time to take a quaddie, to which his wife inquired: "What is this quaddie?"

He explained that it required you to select the winners of the last four races.

"I'd be interested in that," she said, and just as he cleared his throat to give her his prognostication he was drowned out.

"I think I'll take that one because that's my favourite colour, this one because it's my uncle's middle name and that one because it was my grandmother's favourite number."

What a waste of money this was, thought the husband, but $60 was invested. And even after the first two legs were successful he could see no way that this succession of favourite colours and names could continue.

How wrong he was. The four legs came in and paid a dividend of $40,400, and the couple's marriage seemed as glowing as the first time they'd met.

On the way home the husband suggested that they celebrate at the finest French restaurant in Melbourne.

Floating on the effects of the champagne, he also suggested that they take a trip to Europe and pay off their mortgage.

But his dreams were dashed when his wife informed him that she had very different plans.

"I've put aside $80 for a counter dinner tonight at a local hotel, I need a further $300 to pay off today's outfit and I've got a special idea what to do with the balance. Tomorrow I'll be investing in a block of shares that I heard the people at another table at the races bragging were a money-back guarantee."

Dutifully the wife contacted a stockbroker the following morning and within hours $40,000 of this stock was purchased at $17.15 a share.

The following week the husband was explaining to friends at work how his wife had invested the quaddie money and then opened the finance pages to check up on his wife's gilt-edged investment.

Not unlike a punter who'd ticked the wrong box at the TAB, our friend suddenly felt ill when he read that "Babcock and Brown Has Taken a Savage Hit" in overseas markets. In fact, a savage hit was very much an understatement as the shares dropped from $17.15 to 28 cents.

"Europe never really appealed to me and what's the hurry paying off your mortgage?" he told his workmates. "But I've discovered that there are more places than the racecourse to lose a fortune."

Article written by Patrick Bartley for the Age. February 10, 2009

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